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There has been a critical breakdown of biblical manhood within our culture. Men today need to stand up and be men, leading their families, being the Christ-like example to their peers around them, and following God with all of their heart. This is a difficult call to live up to in our society. But through the call of mentoring, leading, and brothering we can be the men we were called to be.

Erosion of God within our society has had the largest impact on manhood. Men have decided that they no longer need God and choose to do their own thing following their own desires chasing women, money, and fast cars. Anyone can sit down, turn on the TV, and see how anything that is advertised to men uses women, money and the thrill of the ride to get your attention. When was the last time you saw a commercial that used anything biblical to advertise a product on TV? Our Society is moving in a direction that completely eliminates God from the picture. I am reminded of a scripture from Genesis 6:5 “The LORD saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time.” Are we returning to a time where God is nowhere to be found?

Men need to take a stand and be the example for those around them. In their families, groups of peers, relationships, take up your cross and lead like Jesus led. I know from my experience there are moments when I am spending time with those that are really close to me and we begin joking around, it’s very easy for topics to change to ones that may not really be all that appropriate. This is one way you can step up and lead there. If the topic turns to one that’s a little risqué or disrespectful in any way, let others know your feelings on the topic and explain that it’s not God honoring. Take the lead and be the one willing to stand for biblical principles. Ephesians 5:4 says “Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.”

Find a mentor. Everyone should have someone to meet with on a regular basis. It could be once a month, once a week whatever. But every man needs to have someone they look up to that can provide you with Godly guidance and can help to prune you when it is necessary. I have seen this play a huge role in my life. I have had many mentors both before and after attending FLI. It’s been through the mentorships I have had that I have seen much spiritual growth. Every man is called to be a leader, but in order to be a great leader one must learn how to follow, and following in the footsteps of a more spiritually mature man will have an impact on your life like no other experience. It does not have to be anything formal. It could just be something simple like getting together over a cup of coffee. But you must open yourself up and be vulnerable, this allows us to care for each other and seek out God’s plan for our lives. Find someone that can help you to seek God to your fullest potential.

Finding a mentor is very important but there are two parts to the equation. The Bible calls us to be spiritual leaders within the church and in our families. Mentoring is a major part of that responsibility. As fathers we are called to be an example to our children. Mentoring is part of the role of father. Myself I am not a father yet, being only twenty three, but I still feel that it is my calling to be a mentor to someone else younger than myself. One lesson I learned a long time ago is that you can never really know that you completely understand something until you are able to teach it to someone else. Going through the process of teaching it to someone else you learn that lesson in a completely different way and it affects your spiritual growth as a leader. Mentorship is the same way. It is very important to be mentored by someone God directs you to that is more spiritually mature than yourself, but once you reach a level of maturity you must also reach out and be a mentor to someone else. For me as an older guy in the college ministry it is my responsibility to look for someone younger than myself that I can pour into and help them to grow in their walk and their passion for God.

Mentorship is very key in the role of biblical manhood. Accountability goes hand and hand with mentorship. Mentors have to be willing to ask the hard questions, help you grow spiritually, and challenge your walk with Christ on a regular basis. Every man needs to have someone to hold him accountable. Proverbs 27:17 says As Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. We need to have someone come in and sharpen our skills. Accountability is very hard to do and should not be taken lightly in any fashion. We were created as communal beings, and it is much easier to stand with God when there is another Godly man standing beside us to help us hold our ground, just as Aaron helped Moses to hold the staff up during the battle. (Exodus 17)

As men we must also be willing to stand up and lead in our peer groups. Stand up and lead the younger guys in the groups of friends you hang out with, be a big brother to the fellow sisters you know. Suggestions I can offer here are to get together and have group bible studies, followed by group discussions, get together and talk about the sermons you have heard at church recently. These help to stimulate great conversations that all center on who God is and creates the atmosphere where you can step-up and lead. Some great group discussion questions can be very useful tools. You can start with ones such as: “What’s God teaching you this week?” “What have you been reading about in scripture lately?” “What’s God been working on in your life lately?” “How have you seen God working in your life this week?” these are just a few starter questions that you can use. But the key part is to ask these questions on a regular basis. Make it into a habitual part of your friendly talks. It not only provides a way for you to share how god is working in your life but it gets other thinking about it and looking for it on a regular basis.

Be gentlemen to the girls around you. The best way you can lead the women in your life is to treat them all like they were your little sister. Open their doors, take every opportunity to serve them and be their brother in Christ. It makes me so very glad to see when men take the lead and really seek to serve the ladies around them. Organize events and get the guys together to do things to serve the ladies. Cook a meal for them, almost anything could work but you have to take the initiative and do it.

The erosion of biblical manhood has so many effects on our society, but we must not let that get in our way of doing everything that God has called us to do. Stand up in your peer groups for the holy standards we are called to. Find a mentor to shepherd your Christian walk, be a mentor to those who are not as spiritually mature, find someone to hold you accountable and keep tabs on your spiritual walk. Ask your friends the hard questions that keep you thinking about the glory of God. Be the brother to the ladies around you. This is not in any way an exhaustive list of how to be a biblical man, but it is a few suggestions that I know are very important. It’s time to get our hands dirty washing feet. It’s time to answer the call of Christ. It’s time to take up your cross and be the Man God created you to be.

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Who Am I?

I am a creative technical artist and I happen to work for a Church in what I would define as my dream job. I love what God has blessed me with and love to be able to share what I have learned over the 25 years that I have served in ministry.

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Dusten Harward
T: +1 704-431-3851
E: dusten@dustenharward.com